Signs your company is just not that into you

Just Not That Into You

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In relationships, there’s only one thing worse than being broken up with: being with a person for any extended period of time who is physically in the relationship, but completely mentally detached. At least with a break up it’s out in the open. Each person knows how the other feels and can (hopefully!) move on with their lives.

It starts to get dicey (and painful) when you’re involved with someone who’s clearly “just not that into you” but keeps showing up out of convenience. You’re relationship becomes less of an actual relationship and more of a passive aggressive game of “chicken”, or as I like to call it: Who will crack first?

Unfortunately, some companies aren’t unlike these passive aggressive suitors. They employ you out of convenience, and keep y0u on payroll to protect their asses for the time being. But ultimately, they just aren’t that into you.

And guess what? It’s not you’re fault. It’s only your fault if you don’t see the signs, and as a result allow them to ignore you or stunt your professional growth.

I’ve witnessed this dilemma with colleagues, and if I’m being brutally honest, I’ve experienced it myself. It took me a minute, or two (or a thousand) to figure out I was nothing but just another number to that company, but I regret not seeing the signs sooner. So in an effort to potentially save others from “he’s just not that into you syndrome”, I compiled a list of things to lookout for.

Note: As the hollywood film illustrates, there ARE exceptions to the rule.  Consider these red flags, and DO NOT go off and quit your job after reading this list. (k, thanks!)

You’ve asked for more responsibility a few times and they don’t seem receptive.

When your superiors stop listening to your desire for more professional growth within the company it’s time to ask yourself, “what are you really working for?”. Unless they’ve given you specific reasons for not passing along more responsibility, they might as well be blowing you off.  A healthy relationship is one that is constantly growing. If you’re not growing, and your partner doesn’t care, then your relationship is doomed.

You hear about big team or company news from the wrong people. 

Any news about your team or department should come from the leadership within your team or department. If a company is “into you” they keep the lines of communication open and share important things (like a new CEO, a team reorg, loss of a client etc.) with you as they happen. If you’re getting this information from a source outside your direct report, or worse, someone outside the company, then darling, you’re dating a bad boyfriend.

You can’t remember the last time anyone in upper management gave you praise.

You know that saying, “If a guy likes you, he’ll make sure you know he likes you”? Same with a company. If you’ve worked your ass off and continue to be slighted without praise or acknowledgement, your company is not making you a priority. (Note: Don’t ever feel like praise is too much to ask for in a company. Read my post about avoiding the word “lucky”…it will fire you up!)

You feel like if you didn’t initiate your own projects, you wouldn’t have work to do.

In a relationship, have you ever felt like if you didn’t initiate dates or call first, you’d likely never see or hear from the other person? Yea. That.

You feel like decisions are made in a bubble, and you’re hardly ever asked to weigh in.

In a relationship, it takes two to tango darling. Even in the most entry-level of jobs, you should feel like the people you work for care about your perspective as an employee. Consider how much employee feedback your company initiates, and more importantly, how much they actually listen to. If you see a pattern of poor engagement with employees, your company is not only not that into you, they’re WAY too into themselves.


He's Just Not That Into You Gif


So you tell me, are you the rule? Or the exception? 




1 Comment

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